Dumb Ways to Promote Your Blog, Part 1

. . . Get drunk. In front of your girlfriend's mother. Promise to watch "Heat" with her even though your vision is getting a bit blurry. When its apparent that your internet connection is down, and thus you can't watch "Heat" via online streaming, it's probably a good idea to call Optimum Online and get on the phone with a tech guy there. Who's completely sober. Talk his ear off about Blu Ray, Star Trek, and argue with him about how the Bourne movies are the only exception to books being better than the movies based on them. Tell him how awesome your blog is, even though it's only been up for a month and hasn't yet found a focus. As your girlfriend's mother is bewilderingly watching you, it's a good time to stumble around behind the entertainment center, and, as you're talking with the Optimum tech guy about everything but Optimum, make sure to trip over a cable and pull every damn device off the shelf, causing an avalanche of wires, antennae, remotes, modems to fall on top of you. Shrug it off like its no big deal.

Hear about it all goddamn day tommorow.

In other news, I'd like to welcome this blog's first follower. His name's Claudio and he works for Optimum Online. Funny story how he found out about this blog . . .